When I challenged him, he was embarrassed and then defensive saying it was just harmless flirting and that he had not gone over any line.
There is a big difference between a person occasionally viewing pornography with the knowledge and even involvement of their partner to a full-blown betrayal and using adult websites to start affairs with other people.
Like many problems, it can start innocently at first, with a person visiting sexually titillating sites perhaps out of boredom or a seeking escapism but then it can escalate to other behaviours, such as directly communicating with other people online and over time can become addictive and harmful.
Take some time out together You can also take action at home to improve your marriage on a daily basis.
For example you can prioritise a daily talking time with your husband when you share how each of you are doing.
Improving the marriage The discovery of your husband’s online world is a crisis in your marriage but it can also represent an opportunity.
You could see this as a “wake-up call in your marriage to examine problems in the communication between the two of you and to address this.
If you enjoy gabbing with your peers and want to continue when school is out, chat rooms are a great place to meet other like-minded people your age and maybe even engage in lighthearted flirting.
Alternatively, if you are too shy to flirt in school but still want to kick back and banter with other teens, the Internet provides you anonymity. Just click on the enter button and introduce yourself.
Moving forward In the aftermath of discovering your husband’s online world, it is perfectly understandable that you might feel disgusted and betrayed and to worry as to how much you can trust your husband.
You might benefit from going to counselling especially if you feel traumatised and need to the help of an impartial listener to process some of the feelings.
Such intimacy is built on communication and friendship and leads to deep affection and a satisfying sex life.