Similarly, Carver notes that the Loser doesn’t have to exhibit all of the symptoms listed below to be dangerous.
The presence of even three of these symptoms indicates a potentially harmful relationship.
They may do so through overt criticism and by following them around when they meet with others, as Drew did to Stacy.
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Stacy’s growing insecurity also placed her under Drew’s power to determine how she felt about herself. That’s precisely what psychopaths do to their targets.
Losers isolate their partners from their friends, colleagues and families.
Carver states that, for instance, Losers “constantly correct your slight mistakes, making you feel ‘on guard’, unintelligent, and leaving you with the feeling that you are always doing something wrong…
This gradual chipping away at your confidence and self-esteem allows them to later treat you badly–as though you deserved it.” According to Tracy’s and Stacy’s families and friends, after seducing them, Drew undermined both women’s self-confidence.
This is why psychopaths eventually move from the initial over-the-top flattery to scathing criticism.
Once they have secured their chosen partners in their grasp, they put them down to erode their self-esteem.No matter how promiscuous they actually are, they focus their energies on their most desirable targets.Yet, Carver cautions, this seemingly positive sign is, in fact, also negative.You will withdraw from friends and family, prompting them to become upset with you.” 6. As we recall, Drew Peterson bought his wife a motorcycle and expensive jewelry even during the period of time when he was criticizing her, throwing her up against the wall, isolating her from her loved ones, accusing her of infidelity and calling her pejorative names.If they were consistently mean or violent, psychopaths wouldn’t be able to hold on to their partners. Carver observes, “The Loser cycles from mean to sweet and back again.The rapid warm-up is always a sign of shallow emotions which later cause the Loser to detach from you as quickly as they committed.” Which is exactly what Drew Peterson (and others like him) did after seducing each of his partners. The physical outbursts towards inanimate objects function as a form of intimidation.