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This is why so many women say using porn feels like cheating: the act of seeking out another woman for sexual pleasure—even if she is hidden behind a veil of pixels and a sleazy acting agency—is not a movement However, by saying that using porn is breaking a marriage vow, I am not prescribing a specific reaction we should have to it.

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Still, I get a lot of questions from women who are feeling the heartbreaking impact of porn on their marriages. It’s hard not to walk about in public places or go online without seeing something that is at least meant to titillate the eyes of men.

When I say “using” I mean intentionally taking porn in through one’s senses with the intention of being turned on and then, most likely, masturbating or at least getting sexually aroused.

In the other world, we enjoy the convenience and self-centeredness of solo-sex in front of the computer screen.

These two worlds mix like oil and water in our miry hearts.

” and address Two facts lie at the heart of the issue.

First, people often desire the perks of marriage, but marriage vows are not taken seriously. In one world, we embrace an idyllic picture of finding “the one,” growing old together, loving and serving another person until death we do part.Behind the making of pornography are real people really selling themselves for the sexual gratification of viewers.The medium doesn’t change the fact that a prostituted woman was used for her body and sex appeal, no matter the viewer’s understanding of the act.Before long, you will either have to abandon pornography or abandon a genuine spirit of monogamy.Second, people have been blinded by the sense of distance the digital world places between ourselves and the real world.He is defrauding you of something that should be your exclusive domain. You just take your vows seriously, as everyone should. Start by getting educated about the addictive nature of pornography and the steps other couples have taken to take a new direction.

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