God wants us to strive to remain pure until marriage.
You can read more about it in my previous blog post, 5 Things My Online, Long Distance Relationship Taught Me. God will lea me to the right person at the right time, but that time is not now. Being ready for marriage means being ready to make the ultimate sacrifice.
As I dealt with my third failed relationship in a two-year time period I began to wonder, “What is wrong with me? ” Some of my friends began suggesting books to help me to deal with the breakup and simply get over it since after 2 months of being dumped I still wasn’t feeling any better. Now is a time to be single, but singleness isn’t always a bad thing. I like how Harris explains that God gives us the gift of singleness. Being able to take care of a partner, truly understanding each other, having the finances, and the blessings from family.
My blog pages elaborate on this and asks if “kissing dating goodbye” is appropriate for all ages.
Temporarily “kissing dating goodbye” which could also be called postponing dating might be appropriate especially for younger teenagers.
He emphasizes the importance of spending time with the opposite sex in group settings instead of one-on-one in an effort to demolish the feel of intimacy and temptation.
Have you ever been alone with someone you were attracted to? Maybe you’ve went too far or had to seriously fight off the temptation. Harris explains that the best way to fight temptation is to simply work to avoid settings where temptation can arise to begin with.
This is my attempt to share some of my thoughts on “kissing dating goodbye” and “courtship” practices. If nothing else I hope to encourage people to think about the concept and decide for themselves what is most important for them in their situation.
Note: Much of my criticism of the “kissing dating goodbye” approach is from the perspective of a single person in his 20’s and 30’s who was involved in churches where this approach was the norm.
Rather, for him courtship is “dating with a purpose.” In other words, you shouldn’t start a relationship with someone unless you are actually ready to get married and think the person in question is likely the one you want to marry.
Harris condemns “recreational dating” in no uncertain terms.
Society tells us we should date around, not take things too seriously, and not worry about commitment. Purity in Harris sense means so much more than just abstaining from sex. That seems to be the hard part…trusting God’s perfect timing.